snow days

sledding with the gunn familia: we borrowed gear from them. the hat reminds me of something:
in our backyard:

lulled to sleep. reminds me of this:
right after shoveling the stairs i thought, hmm...

and i shoveled it back on.

chloe asked me to take a picture of her. just as i was about to snap it she said, "wait." and got in this pose:
after a storm:
once there was a snowman..

sleep deprived

this was how my night went:
put fred to sleep at 10:00.
he woke up 40 minutes later.
spent 20 minutes trying to get him to burp.
he woke up again at 11:something
again at 12:something. i fed him.
he woke up at 2:something.
again at 3:something
again at 4:something. i fed him again.
woke up at 5:something
again at 5:somthing more
dan's alarm went off at 6:00. i fiercely ordered him to be quiet.
fred wakes up at 6:20
dan leaves at 6:30.
chloe comes running in crying, "he's leaving!" she tries to catch him but it's too late. she comes back crying. i'm holding fred and tell her, "i just got him back to sleep. i didn't get any sleep last night. i cannot handle any crying. if you want to cry go back in your room and shut the door."
miracle of miracles, she replies, "ok" and leaves.
fred wakes at 7:something. i fed him.
wakes again at 8:something. and we start our day.

its not always this bad but its never good. he rarely sleeps longer than two hours. its weird to me that the main question about babies is, "how is he sleeping?" i feel like the quality of my mothering is being judged based on his sleep habits.
the problem is he is very sensitive to what i eat. he squirms all night long. sometimes he's able to let out some gas but usually he just has blow outs the next morning.
things i can't eat while breastfeeding:

• dairy products (milk, cheese, yogurt, icecream....)
• anything spicy (mexican, curry, salsa)
• anything considered gassy (beans, broccoli, cabbage)
• citric fruit
• chocolate

things i think he might not like:

• whole grains (oatmeal, granola bars)
• nuts (peanut butter)
• eggs
• edemame
• small doses of problem foods, like just one little bite of chloe's quesadilla.

living off of meat, bread, rice, crackers, and pasta is not easy. plus, carbs contribute to insomnia (not something i need). do you know how appealing a grilled cheese sandwich is when you can't have one? i make small slips everyday. this is why he is gassy and squirms all night. this is why i am tired. this is why i am an impatient mother to chloe and stella. this is why i am a grumpy wife. and out of shape, and my house is messy, and stella isn't potty trained--everything can be blamed on lack of sleep, right?

sometimes, in the middle of the night, i feel like quiting nursing and feeding him the pre-digested formula that he can handle. but i know i'm way too lazy to prepare bottles and wash bottles and pack bottles when we leave the house. i'm all for letting the baby cry it out. but only when i know he is tired, has a clean diaper, doesn't have to burp, and isn't uncomfortable (gassy). i just can't sleep when he is crying. even if i can't hear him, if i know he's crying i won't be able to sleep. should i let him cry even if he's gassy? how long after i eat an offensive food will it effect him? i'm hoping he will out-grow it soon.

well, i just needed to vent, i guess. but if anyone has read this far, maybe you can give advice.

5 months

a bunch of facts about fred:

fred loves baths and his sisters. if i need to get something done i just set him in front of the girls and tell them to dance around. they are very good at making him laugh.

he loves the toy above his changing table. he has gone from focusing on the toys-to accidentally swatting them-to grabbing them-to pulling the whole thing off the wall and chewing on it.

he has mastered grabbing things. he's so good he can do it in his sleep.

we decided on his middle name--maddox--by drawing it out of a hat.

he was born with a prominent ridge from his lip to his nose. looks like he had a cleft but he didn't. thank goodness. you can make him smile very easily even in the middle of a crying fit.

we gave him this horse to stop him from scratching and clawing at his face when he's upset. i think i'll call him mr. ed. he has leg-warmers so i could call him mr. simmons but that doesn't rhyme with fred.

he is very ticklish and likes to be tossed up in the air.

chloe made these glasses for him:

he can roll over from back to belly.he is very sensitive to what his mother eats and squirms a lot at night. he doesn't sleep longer than 3 hours at a time and usually it is only two or one.he is nauseated by the smell of a clean shirt. (stole that joke)he likes to suck his toe.he is a happy and easy baby. we are so happy that he is not a girl. we love him very much.

$100

we were in the car headed home and i asked chloe where her backpack was. she started freaking out because she didn't know.

"i left it!"

"oh, nevermind. i remember, its at home."

"no it isn't!" (very dramatic)

"yes, it is, chloe. i remember, its by the door."

"no, its not. i promise!"

"chloe, if its not by the door i will give you a hundred dollars."

her eyes get really big, "ok" (sneaky smirk)

we get in the house and she sees her backpack. "mom!" she starts to cry. "i wanted a hundred dollars!"

i tried to explain to her that i wouldn't have wagered $100 if i wasn't sure that it was there. but she didn't get it.

holiday review

we had a good holiday. we followed an advent calendar. this is the first year we have done it and it made life more festive. it helped that the girls can't read and i could easily change "make gingerbread houses" to "watch a movie". we did a lot of fun things. and some not-so-great things, like zoo lights. lame. most of the animals were asleep or closed up. and it was too dark to see the nocturnal ones. the lights were cool though. here are some pictures:

zoo lights:

santa at chloe's preschool:

family party in st. g:

preschool program: enchanted nativity:
Christmas eve:
Christmas morn:
click here for more pictures. you know you wanna.

family photos

my brother jordan took some pictures of us in an effort to get a photo for a Christmas card. this was the winner: fred just wants more ^

bah hum bug

this was taken as we were headed to the car. it wasn't posed.